Able2Laugh

Joke stolen from: Able2Laugh

Los Angeles police talked down a naked man who was threatening to jump off the cross atop a church steeple Sunday. He's lucky a cop happened along. Nudity's been the official religion of Los Angeles for so long that nobody even noticed him up there. (Argus Hamilton)

Joke stolen from: Able2Laugh

There was a clerk in a small town general store in the South. One day, a tall man entered the store and began filling a shopping cart with items. This man was so distinctive in that he could have been the official spokesperson for Quaker Oats. He was dressed in black, very tall and had that hat just like the Quaker Oats guy wears. Well, the clerk had never seen a Quaker before, let alone talked to one. When the man reached the counter with his selections the clerk could hardly contain himself. "Are you a real Quaker?" he asked as he was ringing up the merchandise. "Yes," the tall man said with a little edge in his voice. "No joke?" asked the clerk, "You're really a real Quaker?" The man, looking a little more perturbed, said, "Yes, I am a real Quaker." "Wow!" the young clerk said, "I never seen a real Quaker before. Would you say something in Quaker talk for me?" asked the clerk. The tall man ignored this request and waited for his merchandise to be tallied up. "Please mister, say something in Quaker talk?" The man finally leaned over the counter in a gesture of secrecy. The clerk leaned forward in order to hear the quiet reply. The man said, "Fuck Thee."

Joke stolen from: Able2Laugh

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. -- Mark Twain

Joke stolen from: Able2Laugh

The biggest difference between Republicans and Democrats is the spelling. -- Anonymous

Joke stolen from: Able2Laugh

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul -- George Bernard Shaw