Teacher's Lounge

Joke stolen from: Teacher's Lounge

I'm a high-school geometry teacher, and I started one lesson on triangles by reading a theorem. "If an angle is an exterior angle of a triangle, then its measure is greater than the measure of either of its corresponding remote interior angles."

I noticed that one student wasn't taking notes and asked him why.

"Well," he replied sincerely, "I'm waiting until you start speaking English."

Joke stolen from: Teacher's Lounge

After an exhausting weekend, I woke up Monday morning and sleepily packed lunch for my eight-year-old child. When I got home from work late that day, she handed me a note from her teacher, requesting that I see her.

"What's this all about?" I asked sternly. Opening her lunch box, my daughter showed me the drink I had given her that morning. It was a can of beer.

Cynthia Briche in READER'S DIGEST

Joke stolen from: Teacher's Lounge

Some students told their business teacher, "We're gonna roll your yard on Halloween." She just smiled. They insisted, "We're gonna do it!" She didn't bat an eyelash.

On Halloween night, the girls showed up, as they had said they would, and did a bang-up job of rolling the teacher's yard. Before they left, they pulled the car in front of the yard to admire their handiwork, car windows rolled down and laughing themselves silly.

At that moment, the teacher's husband, who had been lying in wait with the garden hose ready, let go with the water sprayer on full open and soaked the girls and the inside of their car.

Who had the last laugh that night?

Joke stolen from: Teacher's Lounge

I teach two Karens. One Karen is an angel, never does anything wrong, and she is a joy to teach. One is a terror, doing something wrong every day, and driving me "up the wall."

I have the "bad" Karen the last period of the day, and one day she had pushed so many of my buttons and caused so much disturbance in class that I put her out of the classroom with a note to the principal that she not be allowed back into my class without a parent conference.

As luck would have it, I got the message before the period was over that Karen's mother was in the office. I gladly raced to talk to her. I let her know all about the things that Karen did every day in every class, and I assured her that all Karen's other teachers had the same report of her behavior. The mother was just astonished.

We kept talking, and I slowly figured out that this mother was the mother of the "good" Karen! Oops!

She and I laughed about it later after we had figured out what had happened, but I felt SO horrible at the time!

Joke stolen from: Teacher's Lounge

I am a teacher, plus being a mommy of two "angels." My older one is in kindergarten. Being a "teacher" mommy is not always easy. I was very concerned about the amount and complexity of work my child was doing at school and for homework.

She has had a spelling test every week since the second week of school. These words have been hard. Of course, may daughter has done fine with all the work. It is just a mommy being "over concerned" was what I kept being told by the teacher.

However, I requested a conference with my child's teacher and the principal to discuss the work. The night before the conference, I decided to discuss some things about school with my daughter. I asked her if there was anything difficult at school. She answered very quickly that yes, there was something that was very difficult. Being the "all-knowing mommy" I knew that she was going to say the second-grade reader, spelling words, or even the math.

But she looked at me with a very serious expression and said, "Sometimes the milk at lunch is very difficult to open." There went my ammunition for my meeting!