THIS is TRUE

Joke stolen from: THIS is TRUE

FAST FOOD: "The fireball was unbelievable," said a witness to the crash. "He could've been fried," said a fire department spokesman, adding the impact into the power pole sent sparks flying as wires fell down around the vehicle. Electricity in the area was out for two and a half hours. But the Leesburg, Fla., crash saved the driver's life. Dean R. Woodring, 43, was eating a hamburger while driving, and a bite got stuck in his throat. He couldn't breathe and passed out at the wheel. Because he wasn't wearing a seatbelt, his chest slammed into the steering wheel upon impact -- causing the burger chunk to shoot out of his mouth in an unusual self-administered Heimlich Maneuver, rescue workers said. Woodring received only minor injuries, but was cited by police for careless driving and driving without wearing a seat belt. (Orlando Sentinel) ...The $64,000 question: should he contest the fine?

Joke stolen from: THIS is TRUE

SIT ON IT: It's not known whether Enrique Aquilar Canchola, 42, thought his disguise would work, but it definitely didn't. The Mexican national tried to cross the Mexico-U.S. border into San Ysidro, Calif., disguised as a car seat. A U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service inspector discovered the unusual camouflage when he checked the back of a van as it tried to sneak him over the border. (London Times) ...He agreed to it after learning immigrants are often treated like furniture. http://www.thisistrue.com/chaired.html

Joke stolen from: THIS is TRUE

ORBITAL INSERTION: "At first, the plan was just to open a space hotel," says Gene Meyers, president of California's Space Island Group, which hopes to build a hotel in Earth orbit. "But our research shows that the real reason couples want to spend a week in space is for fabulous sex." Rooms are projected to cost about a million dollars per week per couple, substantially less than the reported $20 million pioneering "space tourist" Dennis Tito paid Russia for several days in orbit. Meyers says there are "millions of couples who want to try [space sex] and join the '400-mile high club'. All of a sudden the world can see that space tourism is just around the corner. Mr Tito has made it a reality." (PA) ...Reality indeed: he's divorced and had to take his "space sex vacation" by himself.

Joke stolen from: THIS is TRUE

PERFECT FOR CONGRESSIONAL OFFICES: Introducing the "Besk", a combination bed and office desk designed for people who work late at the office. Invented by Antony Dixon of Buckinghamshire, England, the 650 pound (US$900) item could spell trouble. "Sleeping in the office is OK once in a while, but there are people who will become trapped by this," predicts a British doctor. "While employers may see the Besk as a good investment it is only a short term way of getting staff to work longer hours." The prototype is built out of aluminum and plywood and can support two adults. (PA) ...A desk big enough for two that's so expensive that only the boss can afford it, and he thinks people will use it at NIGHT?

Joke stolen from: THIS is TRUE

HOW CAN YOU SAY POLITICIANS ARE OUT OF TOUCH? When the character "Mrs. Landingham" -- the president's secretary in the TV show "The West Wing" -- was killed off in a recent episode, California State Assemblyman Kevin Shelley mourned the character in open session, noting that Mrs. Landingham was "a great American" whose "contributions to the nation were too numerous to count." Other legislators were confused. "Nobody could tell if she really died or fake died," said one aide. Actress Kathryn Joosten, who played the role, is alive and well. Shelley found out about the fictional death from his wife, noting "It was tragic. [My wife] was crying, I was upset. It was terrible." (AP) ...On that same day, 6,764 real Americans died, yet none of them were deserving of his tears.